


Talk To Me

by Thanfiction



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Gen, Implied Relationships, Implied Torture, Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-02-11
Updated: 2013-02-11
Packaged: 2017-11-28 23:27:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,855
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/680077
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Thanfiction/pseuds/Thanfiction
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean is not letting go this time.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Talk To Me

_Cas, I don’t even know if you can hear me, but I’m gonna just pretend you can, okay? I’m sorry about Purgatory. I know I said…that sometimes, I got pretty pissed off at you and then I thought you were dead other times and I unloaded a lot of crap on you, and it - ok, most of it - wasn’t fair. I shouldn’t have underestimated you like that. I’m not gonna go pretending that you haven’t made some epic fuckups, because we both know better, but you’ve always thought you were doing the best thing for us or for your family, and I get that. I screwed Sammy over pretty good with his girl a few months ago if I needed a reminder that I’m in a big ol’ glass house on that one. But you’re family, Cas. You’ve earned it, you’ve earned it so many fucking times. You…I can’t even. When I think about what you’ve done for me…I gotta say, dude, I think you’ve had a screw loose all along, you know? You saw me down there. You saw what I — just, thank you, ok?_

_And I’m not asking anything this time. I just want you to know that Sam and I are ok, and to know that we saw what was going on with you, and I don’t know if someone’s reading your mail, but we’ve kept the light on, and you know how to dream of Jeannie if you need to go there. And you’ve got my number. Any time, Cas. You say the word, and we’ll be there. Heaven or hell or wherever you want us to be, even if, you know, there’s an airplane involved for us non-zapping meatsacks. You’ve earned it, buddy. Don’t you ever forget that. Whatever part of you can hear me, don’t you forget it. I still need you, and Sammy and I could always use a third wheel. I’ll even let you ride shotgun…but if you think you’re playing that Don McClean shit, you ain’t that crazy any more._

* * *

_This one’s not for you, Cas. If you can hear it, that’s good, and I want you to know that we’re still in your corner, buddy. You hang in there; don’t let the bastards get you down. Because it’s been months now, and you weren’t just not ok when you left, you weren’t even you. You were less you than when you were you but you didn’t know you were you. And there is no way, no way you’d have ignored me this long if something else weren’t going on, or that if it were just upstairs shit you’d leave me out of the loop after what went down with you and Crowley. So this one? Hand over the phone. This is for whatever seriously stupid motherfucker has my angel and I know damned well is listening. You think you’re hot crap on a stick, don’t you? You’ve got yourself a real live made in China goddamned Seraph, and you’re pulling his strings like Pinocchio. Well guess what, dickface? He’s a real live boy, and he’s ours._

_See, my name’s Dean Winchester, and I’ve got a lot of guns, an attitude problem, and a brother, Sam, about the size of one of those east coast New-something states. If you haven’t heard of us, you could ask Lucifer, Michael, Azazel, Alastair, Zachariah, Lillith, Samhain, Dick Roman, or some of the four Horsemen of the Apocalypse. Or not. Because we ganked every one of those assholes, and that’s just the first line of our resumes. And maybe you think you’re cool. Maybe you think you’re fine, you’re different, because we could never get to you wherever the fuck you are. And sure, right now, ok. You win. We have no goddamned clue. We have no hint of an idea of a clue where you are, or even who or what you are. Except all we need to know is that you’re the thing that’s got Cas, and my Dad hunted the demon that took our Mom for 22 years that were our real impressionable ones, if you get my drift. That angel may be your trophy, but he’s our family, and he’s my friend, you piece of shit._

_So you just go out and take your three-headed puppy on a nice little walk. Have some baby-blood ice cream or whatever stuffs your Oreo. Because when I find you - and I will find you - you’re gonna wish you’d never been hatched. Because there’s a lot of shit I swore I’d never do again, and the longer I’m without the angel on my shoulder, the more I’m starting to reconsider._

_Capiche?_

* * *

_Our father who art in…whoever’s in charge up there, I guess. Look, I know we’re not on the best terms, but please don’t hang up the phone._

_Yeah, this is about Cas. Or Castiel to you. The one you sent hellside to get me who came back with a hardcore case of humanity herpes? I don’t know if you’ve noticed, because it seemed to take a while to figure it out with Alfie, but he’s gone AWOL, and we could seriously use some help in tracking him down. And I get it, you’re pissed. He made a hell of a mess up there, and he’s had some fratricide issues. But he’s sorry; he’s beyond sorry, and he’s been trying to make up for it and…nevermind. I don’t have to apologize to you pricks._

_Bottom line is you’re all supposed to be such big fans of God, and Cas seems to be pretty big on His list, because that bastard’s been brought back from cancellation more often than the original Star Trek. Not to mention that the last time you lost an angel, he got hacked, and Cas…well, I’m guessing he’s a little higher up the food chain than Wiener Hut, isn’t he? It’d be a real shame if something happened to him. And then you’d have angry Winchesters to deal with, and we have a history of being such a pain in your asses when we get annoyed. So you might want to pop on down here or dial-a-prophet or light a bush or send an email or something or Sammy and I are going to go it alone, and whatever happens, I’ll remind you we’ve got an angel blade, a couple leftover feathers, a bunker chock-full of interesting books, and some serious abandonment issues._

* * *

_Cas? It’s Sam. I don’t know what’s going on right now, and I’m not gonna lie; the idea of what kind of power it would take to do what we saw happen to you and to keep you somewhere or in some state that you can’t answer Dean is a little intimidating. But we’ve taken on worse. And I know you. You fought out from under every Leviathan in Purgatory long enough to try to drown them, and I know what something like that takes. Hell, Cas, I took on Lucifer myself, and you’ve been in my head; you know I’m not that big a deal…I just wasn’t gonna let that son of a bitch kill Dean._

_He’s been — he needs you. In some ways, he’s doing a lot better, but we both know that there are a lot of asterixes on that, and most of them have to do with you. Dean’s about two weeks, my best guess, from taking the car and becoming Dad all over again until he finds you, and I can’t say I blame him. You and he…well, I don’t know what you have, but like you said, it’s a more profound bond. In some ways, I think I’d be jealous, except…I want you to see what we’ve found. I can’t talk about it when the phones are probably tapped, but I’ve found a home, Cas. This is something I could really do, something I could be good at and still maybe even have a stable life and even a family without abandoning Dean. But he’s a Hunter to the core, and it’d be a waste for him to let that go, except he’ll need a new partner for the week to week salt and burns. Someone he trusts. Another warrior._

_I don’t know. I’m not trying to make you feel guilty. I know if you could come here you would. Maybe I’m just trying to give you something to hold on to. That you’ve got something to come back to. I’ve seen the way you look at him. I get it, as much as I ever could considering we’re cut from some pretty different cloth. I just wanted to let you know that Dean’s not the only one in your corner, and that I never got the chance when you were all here to say I forgive you for the wall - and it sounds so, so stupid to say that to an angel with all the stuff I’ve pulled and Lillith and - but I do. I really, really do, and whatever’s going on now, you’ve got nothing to be afraid of here. No judgment, man. Just…hold on til you can fight your way out or we can fight our way in._

_We’ll bring you home. That’s a promise._

* * *

_I’m sorry…you should let me go. I can’t do this._

* * *

_Oh yes you can. You son of a bitch, I’ve seen you turned into spray paint and marinara sauce and you still came back. You suck at goodbye too much to stay gone, and there’s still a hellgate to seal that I ain’t taking on without Captain Smiteypants, so you fucking hang in there, you hear me? Don’t you dare give up. Because we won’t. That’s a promise._

  
_I don’t let go, Cas. Not of you._

* * *

_He said he heard from you, but he won’t say what. Called it “total bullshit,” so I’m thinking, knowing you, that you went the noble self-sacrificing route and told him to leave you? Sorry. I’ve known the guy for 30 years, and he doesn’t work like that. He’s dug into you deeper than anyone I’ve seen since…um, me, I guess, and telling him to let you go - unless he’s mad enough to tear your head off and then only until his pride calms down - is basically reverse psychology. Which would be why he’s swearing his way through a list of stuff he’s gonna do to whatever’s got you that…I mean, it’s…dude. He’s actually kind of scaring me. Nevermind, you saw where he got the ideas, didn’t you? Anyway. We’ve got to see a man about a dog - or an advanced placement student - and then I really hope you knew what you were doing, because there’s no way I’m stopping him now. Keep faith, Cas. Gotta run. Amen._

* * *

_Please._

* * *

_Just don’t let go. Not this time. Don’t you dare let go. Don’t you fucking dare. Goddamn it, Cas. Please. Please, buddy. I’m praying, I’m begging. I will pull this car over and get down on my knees if I have to. Whatever you do, don’t let go._

Don't let go.


End file.
